Posted on Saturday 11th of July 2020 07:43:02 PM


janell duncan

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I've done my fair share of research, and I can say with a high degree of confidence that the only thing hotter than a jaguar in a bikini is a girl who can drink! I'm talking about drinking a cocktail. And I don't mean your average old-fashioned vodka, but the kind of vodka you'd find in a bar in Miami Beach. The kind that makes you wanna put on your flannels and walk to the nearest bar in a hurry, or the kind that takes your breath away. I'd have to guess that if you're looking for the hottest chick in Miami, you're not looking at all, because I don't see her. I see my jaguar. He's right over there, and he's having the time of his life, and he has a drink in his hand, and he's looking at me like he's expecting me to give him a hug. This jaguar has the world's largest mouth. This jaguar's in the middle of my drink. My drink's not even there. He's like, "Yo, jeez, I didn't know you'd been drinking like that." And it's just that one time.

I'm looking at this chick, and I'm like, "Yo, do you want to have a beer?" And she's like, "Yeah, I'd love to." Then she goes , "I think I might need a drink." And I'm like, "Do what?" She's like, "I'm just going to craigslist kingston jamaica get the fuck out of here and I'm not jamaica singles getting in my car." And I'm like, "Oh, good. And where are you going?" And she's like, "I'm going to go to the bar, where I've been drinking, and I'll be there for a while." And then she goes, "Okay, now I'm going back to my car." I'm like, "Good, and you go. Go." So that was it. And then I'm walking by her, and she's just like, "Hey, I'm having a fucking beer." And I'm like, "Yeah, do what you want. It's not like I'm trying to have sex with you. You're going to drink a beer . Just go get in my car and leave me alone." And she goes, "Okay, so now what? I'm going to go drink some more beer, so I'll just be there." And then we're walking, and this kid walks up to her and he's like, "Hey, you looking at me in the eye?" I'm like, "No, you're looking at me on the back." And he says, "You got a beard?" And she's like, "Yeah." And he's like, "That's the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life." Now, this dude was in a band, and they were like, "You're looking so fucking cool." And we all knew, but then he said, "So I've got a boyfriend, and he's not in the band." We were all just like, "How the fuck are you doing this?" And he goes, "Well, he's in the band." He said, "I don't know what cupid.com dating site I'm doing with my life, but I got a boyfriend." So I said, "I'll give you a chance." And he goes, "And you want to come up and get his number?" I'm like, "No, we don't want to do that, man. That's too personal. And it's not cool to get your friends involved." And he said, "No, no, I can't do that. You're a good friend, and I'm not trying to date you." So I was like, "Fine. But we have to go to bed together, man. And I'm going to go get your number, because this is the last time you ever want to date me." And then I went get his number, and he goes, "Oh, shit. I'm on the phone with her." I was like, "Alright, cool. I have to go back to my place, because she's in town. We carribean ass can meet up later."

So we did. I was at my girlfriend's place when he showed up, and I was just like, "This is amazing. This is so incredible." So he started talking about the crazy night that she'd had and what she'd seen and what the whole thing was about. He said, "Oh, it's cool. I just wanted to know if you could come by my place a couple times and check it out."

I'm like, "Yeah, of course I would."

So I go to his house and he's just like, "Yeah, sure. You're welcome. Come." And he walks in and he has this super-cute little black dress on and she's wearing these tight white panties and he's wearing a little dress too. It was crazy. So we just talked, and he just said, "You know what? You should talei thompson come over a couple times. It's like a secret." He was so funny and she was so cute, and we just kind of hung out.

[Angel Donovan]

Okay, so you know, a lot of guys get a little confused. What you want to do is omar crespo you want to go through that first step, which is go to her Facebook page and like the page and then you just go through the normal, you know, I just want to send her a text and then we can talk for a little bit. But then, I think, when you get the message and it looks like you're kind of, like, I have a crush on her and then you see her in person, and it's like she's like "I don't know. I arbania guess I'll just hang out with you?" That's the worst feeling.